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To feel fresh air again

Family story Hospice SinglePoint

Siblings Jo and Steve enjoyed an unexpected summer’s afternoon outside in the Hospice garden with their mum, Pam. It was the first time Pam had been outside in five years.

Until her mum's carers told her about the support from St Helena Hospice, Jo had not realised her mum could be referred for support as she believed it was for people with a cancer diagnosis. Jo shares what it meant to her when Pam was admitted to the Hospice.

Speech markMum has been hoist dependent since lockdown and it's been really hard to get her outside because of steps and she couldn't support her body in a wheelchair. But here she is outside, looking at the clouds, fresh air for the first time in nearly five years. It's just incredible.

Isn’t it wonderful, Mum, to feel that fresh air on your skin? To be able to see the sky and the clouds and the birds.

The idea came into the nurses’ minds and within 10 minutes she was out here. It's incredible, thank you. It's my biggest birthday present ever.

There was also a wedding blessing in the garden today for the daughter of another patient and the bride gave her bouquet of flowers to me for my birthday.

Ross from SinglePoint got us a bed at the Hospice, thank goodness. He was amazing and such a lovely man, so easy to talk to and understanding. He got us here and I'm so grateful and so grateful to the Hospice for having us because it's been quite hard looking after mum at home. Now we're here, I feel like I've got the support and the love, and they have given Mum her dignity back. It's been lovely, it's a wonderful place.

Image: St Helena Hospice patient with daughter and son in a hospital bed in the hospice garden

Jo with her mum, Pam, and brother Steve in the Hospice garden

The care company referred us, they were so fantastic, they knew that mum was coming towards end of life and they referred her to St Helena Hospice. I didn't know you could do that, I thought it was just for cancer. SinglePoint phoned and said a nurse would be with us over the weekend, unbelievable service. Ross phoned the next morning and said he was coming round, and that was the start of mum being here. Within hours she was here and settled, and she has her dignity.

She's now under 24/7 nurse care and medication. It's been a struggle and it's been quite lonely at times, but we're here now and she’s end of life and she's peaceful. I can sit here, be her daughter and just enjoy our time together, listen to André Rieu, hold her hand, just stare at each other, until it’s her time.

All I wanted to do was my best and sometimes it was a real fight with the system, but I feel I'm at peace now as well. I've done my best for my mum, she always did the best for me and my brother. So we feel like we've done it and especially now Tim spiritual care has come and read her last rites and said some prayers, she’d love that. 

Some animals came into the Hospice to visit the patients earlier and Mum actually moved to touch them. She has dementia and she just can't really move, so to see her actually move to touch the animals, that took a lot of strength, that she was really reacting positively to those animals, was lovely. She loved animals, so seeing the animals, what a day, honestly! It made me really, really happy; I've got lovely memories now, what wonderful memories.

If she gains her angel wings tonight, she’ll go a happy woman. So will I.

Every second is so precious now. It's hard; you go home, you want to be here, you’re here you think I should really pop home and see what's going on, but ultimately I want to be here with her.

I just wanted to be a daughter. I don't want to be a decision maker anymore. Decisions are really hard to make when someone's poorly. I wanted someone to make the decisions and that's what's happened. Now I'm her daughter again. 

I know she's in such good hands; I've got back up, it's wonderful. It’s been really, really peaceful, so thank you St Helena Hospice. Speech mark 

Image: St Helena Hospice patient with nurses in the garden
Image: St Helena Hospice patient and daughter with nurses in the garden

This story may not be published elsewhere without express permission from St Helena Hospice.

 

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