A few months before Roger died, he mentioned he’d like to go out to the pub to enjoy a real ale with his friends, so the Hospice in the Home team made it happen. His wife Di continues to raise funds for St Helena in Roger’s memory, even taking on a daring skydive! Di shares their story:

We don't talk about dying and death enough. It's a taboo subject. I knew that Roger was dying. I don't think Roger knew Roger was dying. I think he was in denial because he didn't want to. He wanted to live. He fought and fought and fought. They gave him a week and he lasted four months.

I didn't know much about the Hospice until we got referred for personal care when Roger became unwell. The doctor said to me this is end of life care and referred us to the Hospice. I didn't know what to expect. Debbie, a specialist nurse, came round and talked Roger all through it. I remember that day she sat in the bedroom with him and she said they would start the care in the morning so carers will come round in the morning and then round in the evening to get ready for bed. And he said no but she said, just give it a go. So these carers pulled into the car park and Roger sat there and he's like, you tell them to go, I don’t want them in here. And I said, but they've come to help. You help, you do it. I said yeah, I know but they’ve come to help me and give me support as well. 

So he was very anti for the first few days but then he started saying as the cars were pulling in, here are my ladies. They didn't come in and treat him as a patient. They treated him like a friend; they laughed, they joked, and seeing him laughing and joking was brilliant because we didn't have a lot to laugh and joke about. 

He was quite with it then but four months down the line, it was a bit different. No matter what problem I had, I phoned SinglePoint. Middle of the night? It didn't matter, they were there, even if I just wanted to chat. If we didn't have that what would people do? It would be awful because I couldn't have got through those four months. St Helena wasn't just supporting Roger, they were supporting me and even if he didn't want anything they'd come in and sit down and chat with me to make sure I was OK and I had eaten. So if you took that equation out of it, it would have been absolutely dreadful. But I look upon it as it was a privilege; a privilege to share our lives with those wonderful people. 

We were together for 17 years and married for 10. Best 10 years of my life. We had each other and that's what we needed. We did everything together and to get up in the morning and not have that… We were a team. That was really hard at the beginning. I used to feel guilty if I laughed, but he wouldn't want that. I've just started to go out when people invite me to things, which is good. I've got great support and I'm very, very lucky because there's a lot of people out there who haven't. And the Hospice is one of the main supports.

St Helena has been there from day one all the way through and they continue now. And I'm lucky, very lucky. No matter if I raised £3,000,000, nothing would ever repay those ladies and gents that came in and looked after him. 

I'll do anything to help the Hospice. I did a sky dive and that skydive was amazing. I’d do that again absolutely, it was fab. I was strapped to someone and you sit on the edge and then you just roll out free fall for 45 seconds. It was great. Straight through the clouds, which is amazing. And then he taps you on the shoulder and pulls the parachute and these parachutes keep you up in the air, they don't come straight down. So he took me round over the grandkids. The grandchildren, their faces when I got into that plane! Oh, it was amazing. I shouted, this is for you, Roger! 

This story may not be published elsewhere without express permission from St Helena Hospice.